Having to split your time between a baby and a toddler is no easy task. Often times they seem to both need you at the exact same moments.
Big changes like this can also increase unwanted behaviors from your toddler such as frequent temper tantrums.
Here are some simple ways to help older siblings cope with a new baby and how to manage a toddler and newborn at the same time!
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How to Manage a Toddler and a Newborn: Helping Older Siblings Cope with the New Baby
Let Your Toddler Help
Having your toddler help you with newborn tasks may slow you down a bit but it will make them feel included and important.
Perfect opportunities for this would be when you are getting the baby dressed have your toddler help pick out the outfit.
You could also point out to them how they are an important role model for their younger sibling.
Let them know you need them to help teach the baby new skills. Have them help teach your baby to stand or have them help you model silly sounds for the baby to imitate.
This will encourage your baby’s language development.
Include Your Baby in Play
Your toddler will not know how to play with the baby and may feel like it is intruding on their play time. Find simple ways to include the baby in your toddler’s play to make it fun for everyone.
For example, if your toddler is pretending to be animals ask your toddler what kind of animal the baby is.
This is a favorite game of my son’s and he loves to come up with different types of animals for his little sister to be.
Give Your Toddler Extra Snuggles
Your baby is being held and cared for a lot. It is no surprise that your toddler make take notice of this. They may miss some of the physical contact that was once all theirs.
Give them extra hugs or snuggles when you get the chance. Chances are they crave that sort of tough but don’t know how to ask for it.
Have Dates With Your Toddler
Make special time for just you and your toddler to be together. It doesn’t have to be a fancy outing. Just some time where you can focus on them. Some examples of activities would be:
- Complete a craft together or activity (Try this activity challenge if you are looking for some ideas!)
- Go run an errand
- Take a solo trip to the park
- Do a puzzle together
- Read books together
Teach Your Toddler to Share on Their Terms
Once your baby is on the move, guess what they are going to want to play with? Your toddler’s toys!
There are a few different things you can try to help your toddler ease into sharing with the baby.
Ask your toddler what toy the baby should play with.
This gives them a little control of the situation and it also makes them feel important.
Chances are your baby will be happy with whatever toy their older sibling hands over.
You can also model this skill by having the baby “share ” with your toddler.
Teach Your Toddler to Play By Themselves
One of the biggest struggles I encountered when going from one to two was getting my toddler to play alone.
I found there were certain activities that worked well and others not so much.
You can read more about how to encourage your child to play independently here.
Toddler Behavior After New Baby Arrives
You can expect some behavior changes after any large transition in a toddlers life…especially the arrival of a new baby.
They may become more clingy towards you. A new baby and toddler tantrums tend to go hand in hand.
It can even affect things like potty training.
Just be patient! Everything will go back to normal as you all adjust to the new bundle of joy.
Sample Schedule for Toddler and Newborn
If you are looking for a stay at home mom schedule for toddler and baby… this is ours! We did not always stick to it exactly but this is loosely how it went.
Baby/toddler life can be a bit crazy at times.
Have some grace with yourself and be open to change in your schedule.
We often times would go on outings or would play outside when the weather was nice.
After Morning Wake Up:
Feed Newborn: While you are feeding the baby have your toddler look at books or do a quiet activity such as coloring.
Keep them nearby so you can supervise.
Change newborn diaper: Have toddler help by bringing you the diapers and wipes
Feed Toddler Breakfast: Hold or wear your baby while your toddler is eating breakfast. Grab some food for yourself as well!
Newborn Nap Time: Put baby down for a nap. Spend time with your toddler alone. If you have a small space then choose a quiet activity to do together. If you have a larger space or a monitor that reaches outside (this is the one we have) get some of your toddler’s energy out with gross motor play.
Snack Time: Get your toddler a snack and one for yourself as well…especially if you are breastfeeding!
Newborn Feeding: After your baby wakes up a may be time for another feeding depending on your little one.
Supervised Play Time: Now that everyone is well fed it is time to play together. Have your toddler help entertain your baby during tummy time or while playing on the floor.
Outside Time: Go for a short walk or go outside for a bit depending on the climate. A stand and sit stroller (like this) worked best for us!
Lunch Time: Prepare you and your toddler some lunch.
Nap and Rest time: If your toddler is still napping put them down to rest. If not, then allow them some quiet time or screen time so you can get a bit of rest your self. If you can have your newborn nap at the same time. If not…enjoy some alone time with your baby!
Afternoon Snack: Give your toddler a bite to eat upon waking. Feed baby according to their cues.
Supervised playtime: Read a book with them or do a newborn activity that your toddler can help with.
Dinner Time: Get dinner ready and eat with your family!
Create a Bedtime Routine for Toddler and Baby
Bedtime was one of the things that changed the most at our house when my daughter was born.
Going from putting one child to bed to two was not an easy task at first.
My son was going through though the two year old sleep regression which made things even more complicated!
What worked for us at our house was being consistent with both children.
Create a routine using things that you would in any newborn or toddler bedtime routine such as:
- Bath time
- Relaxing massage
- Reading Books (reading tips for parents of toddlers)
- Lullabies
- Soft Music
- Feeding for Baby
- Snack for Toddler
These are just some ideas of what you might want to include. Do what works best for you and your family.
Should I have my newborn and toddler sleeping in same room?
This is definitely a personal choice!
What worked in our house was to have them each in a separate room. If you don’t have enough rooms then you may want to put the baby in your room so night time feedings and changes are a bit easier.
We also had white noise machines (like this) on for each of them so that they wouldn’t wake each other up.
I hope you found these tips helpful!
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Related Posts You Will Enjoy
How to Survive the Two Year Old Sleep Regression
Reading Tips for Parents of Toddlers
Strategies to Encourage Language Development in Early Childhood
Newborn Sleep Tips that Actually Work
Kayla O’Neill has a master’s degree in education as well as a bachelor’s degree in special education with an emphasis in early childhood education. She has been working as a developmental therapist with babies and toddlers in early intervention since 2012. She is also a mom with two young children.